MY DICK IS SO BIG...
...it has it's own dick, and even my dick's dick is bigger than yours.
...when I get a boner, it affects the tides.
...the head has only seen the balls in pictures.
...NASA has launched space probes to find the end.
...I could wear it as a tie, but I'm afraid of getting a hard on and choking myself.
...popcorn now comes in "small", "medium", "large", and "my dick"
...I finally figured out a good use for a woman with a big mouth.
...you're standing on it.
...I need a blood transfusion to get fully erect.
...I was standing in Nebraska, and got a blow job in Alabama.
MY DICK IS SO tiny...
...I put it on a hook and the fish threw it back.
...it has never been caught in a zipper.
...that my wife is still a virgin.
...that I have to masturbate with two fingers.
...that I can use a band-aid for a jock.
...that I can't tell when I have a hard on.
...that erectile dysfunction would be a blessing.
...that I have no fear of snapping turtles while swimming nude.
...that when I take Viagra my toes swell.
...that inchworms make me jealous.
Missus Singapore out!
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