SEX ACCORDING TO THE EXPERTS

I was reading who whole stack of research on sexology (by clinical sexologists) passed on to me by a friend and was left feeling really stupid for them. By and large, they are making announcements that the man-on-the-street would probably already know. Nothing new really.

One of them claims to have found out that a woman touches you the way she wants to be touched. Duh?

Now if a woman begins to gently run her fingers over your body does she really expect you to start slapping her butt or pulling her hair to position her mouth where you want to? Come on. I mean there probably is some guy out there like that but most of them know better?

I agree that a woman tends to set the tone for sex - either she wants it rough and wild or soft and passionate. If ever in doubt, start out slow and you can take it from there to see how robust she wants it.

But then again, if she is already sinking her fingernails into your back whilst rubbing up against you in the lift to your apartment, you can pretty much figure out that she expects a sweaty encounter el pronto.

Looking for her signs to know you are heading in the right direction for her to orgasm? Yeah, I agree that helps but they talk about looking at the colour of her clitoris and labia. The problem with these PhDs is that they obviously don't realise that its not exactly well illuminated down south.

Besides, another study I read found that 76% of people are most comfortable having sex in the dark! These guys are too technical.

Another says that her pupils will dilate. Are you kidding me? In the throngs of ecstasy, I've never heard of a woman opening her eyes for you to look at them. And if its all dark - it's not exactly easy to see them unless you stick your face up close to do so.

It's more accurate to observe her breathing, toe-curling, hand grabbing, moistness and contractions (you can feel it by placing your hand over her abdominal area). And you won't need any light to figure this.

So if you really want to know more about pleasing a woman, it is always going to be easier to do it hands-on. Learn as you play, as I always say. Anyway, sex is a natural part of us and sooner or later, there is a high probability that we will unleash what we all have imbedded in us - our sexual instinct.

Even Homer has been known to be an animal in bed, if Marge is to be believed.

Missus Singapore out!