SEX POSITION FOR THE WEEK #15

SPLITS

This position is ideal for women who want to prevent her man from getting too enthusiastic. It will allow her to control how hard the trusts are. When he gets to a certain rhythm and wants to increase the intensity a little, she can slowly release her legs' grip around him or use her legs to push him a little deeper.

This position is really great as the woman will have her hands free as well. For variation, she can wrap her arms around his neck to lift herself up as if being slung like a hammock - but attached to his body. She can rock herself. If the man is strong enough, he can lift her up with his neck or even reposition to a standing position.

Missus Singapore out!

PS: Thanks to Joe, Lisa, Young Blood and Market Lady for all your feedback on the previous positions featured. I must say you guys are really inventive. I can't find any photos to explain them but I will work on it. Must get a willing male model first. LOL!

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Group Sex Parties May 31 - June 6

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COIN-SIZED VIBRATOR

This is claimed to be the smallest vibrator ever known - the size of a coin. All you need to do really is click a switch and slip it it. I don't know about other women but slipping something so small in down there does not make me feel comfortable.

I mean who knows what might happen in all the excitement - and it apparently boasts one powerful motor. It might get lost and who knows where it might get lodged.

My preferences for vibrators are two fold - the clit stimulators and motor-run dildos. If I had to choose, I suppose I'd prefer one that I can feel inside me ala a real tool.

I just love the added stimulation when the grooves of a dildo rub against the inside walls. Not that it adds to the intensity of the orgasm or that it helps me to cum faster but it's just the feel of it. But that's just me.

Anyway, like all techno gadgets these days, they just keep getting smaller and smaller. Anyone know of an application that turns the iPhone into a vibrator. I'm sure if it's not already out there, someone is working on it as we speak.

Missus Singapore out!

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BOOB GAZE FOR A LONGER LIFE

Here is one interesting study that the men will simply love.

A 5-year study of 200 men found that those who indulge a longing look at busty beauties had lower blood pressure, less stress and lower chance of heart disease compared to those who did not get their daily eyeful.

Dr. Karen Weatherby, who conducted the German study, wrote in New England Journal of Medicine, "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics workout. Sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation. There is no question that gazing at breasts makes men healthier. Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risks of a stroke and heart attack by 50%. We believe that by doing so consistently, an average man can extend his life 4 to 5 years"

I can just see all the men telling their wives and girlfriends why they are online checking out boobs.

There should be a similar study done on women who gaze at big dicks. Chances are they will live longer too. But it may also prove that women who gaze at sub-average dicks will die younger.

Missus Singapore out!

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YOU'VE GOT LAID!

I read about this 25-year-old bargirl from the UK, Louise, who scours the net for sex with men. To date, she has had over 200 men, every one from some adult dating sites (READ: Sex date sites).

She mentioned how she had just come out of a relationship and was missing sex so much. That prompted her to start surfing and getting laid on her terms. She claims it is safer than meeting men at bars.

You can read more about her at News Of The World. She is really quite the attractive woman.

Anyway, what I found most interesting were the comments that followed. A number were open-minded and felt it was her prerogative but most disturbing was how many others were judging her when they hardly even knew the woman.

Perhaps the most annoying ones came with religious overtones.

Now I don't want to get involved with these religious types but for goodness sake, if you think about what she is doing, it is hardly worse than how many others live their lives - with deceit, duress, lies, infidelity, abuse, etc.

She chooses to use her body thus so why should anyone bother. People are always spending way too much time poking insults and judgments on others that they just forget to live their own lives or turn around their own pointless lives. Sometimes I feel, they are just a little jealous about how others are having fun.

If someone comes to you and ask for help, that is a different story. But obviously, the only help Louise needs is to cum.

She lives her life, she bears the consequences - end of story. In any case, I totally support her. After all given the chance, any men would want to fuck 200 women. If he does so, he will get labeled as a stud!

The other group of nay-sayers seem to be the psychologists or shrinks, who are certain she is heading for a emotional brick wall. Granted some people do it recklessly and are addicted to it but again, have they ever thought that some others are just fine and can handle it perfectly well. Let's put it this way, how many times have you heard a shrink get his/her diagnosis wrong? Enough said.

Incidentally, I met this waitress once at a bar here in Singapore. It was a slow night and we started talking. Long story short, she too would sometimes screw the male patrons who came in.

According to her, she had slept with around 100 guys over the three years she was there. When I asked if she was happy, she told me that she hadn't been happier. She didn't intend to do it all her life but was just taking a break from guys using her - so she decided to use them instead.

Missus Singapore out!

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BACK TO THE OLD DAYS

While images of stone-age men pulling their women by the hair may have stuck on with many of us on, things have undoubtedly changed these days.

Now, many women are coming out of their timid shells to grab the bull by the horns or rather, grab the male by the balls. We are making inroads in the workplace, home and out in society.
Men have had it so good for so long so it's only timely that we take over the reins.

But seriously, if a woman wants to and makes an effort to, she can certainly run things in the bedroom. Many men like to be dominated and for those who don't like to, tough. For many, that's what gets them coming back for more.

Play your cards and moves right and you'll have any man eating from your hand in no time.
Thanks Carla from Italy.

Missus Singapore out!

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SEX BITS

Here are some interesting sex bits. Some of the most amazing sex records I've ever come across. Astounding really.

Record 1: The most ejaculatory orgasms ever recorded in 1 hour for a man is 16.

MS: It didn't mention if he survived it or not.

Record 2: The farthest a woman has been recorded to ejaculate is about 9'29" (3 m).

MS: Stand clear of this one or you'll get drowned where you are. I see how some men might enjoy this - as they might any freak show.

General Fact: The average speed of a man's ejaculation is 28 mph (45.05 km/hr). The average speed of a city bus is 25 miles (40.22 km) per hour.

MS: Who says you can't be killed by a speeding sperm?

Missus Singapore out!

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MS ADVISORY

Here is my monthly anti-aids ad. This one is a pretty controversial ad but a very powerful one I feel.

Although I've never personally lost any friends from it, I know of people - siblings of friends who have succumbed to this dreadful disease.

It's time to see the disease for what it is, one that shows no preference for race, religion, language or sexual leanings. The only way we can beat this is if we fight it together as a collective force.

My belief is that while we should not let it interfere with our innate desires to propagate or pornificate, we should do our utmost to ensure that it doesn't propagate.

Missus Singapore out!

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SEX POSITION FOR THE WEEK #14

SPOONING
This is rarely a position used in porn for the simple reason that it is more associated with intimate lovemaking. Pretty hard to do a frantic or robust spoon because the position does not allow for a lot of leverage necessary for thrusting.

There is less movement and freedom from both parties. The women can stick her butt a little backwards to receive penetration but that is about it. For the man, lying on his side means that his penetrative endeavours would depend on his hip - contrary to what some people say. Of course you can also do the to-and-fro sway but it still requires some hip movements.

The great thing about this is that the man can fondle his woman to his heart's content. If his arms are long enough, he could even gentle rub her until she comes. He can also kiss the woman's neck which can do wonders for those who are not otherwise ticklish in the area.

It's a very arousing love-making position when you want to take a break, pillow talk or get ready for the next position. Lots of physical contact means that it's ideal for a couple who want to enjoy closeness to their partner.

For me, I remember using it the first time I entered the mile-high club. It's discrete under the blanket but of course you do it sitting up a little.

Missus Singapore out!

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MATING HUES

Have you ever wondered why some women just seem to glow in a particular dress colour?

Well interestingly, we all have our different colours and hues that bring out the best in us - in a sexy way. I'm not talking about dress design or patterns - just plain colour.

It does bring out the inner sexuality I feel. I could never ever pull off being in a yellow number but my friend Susan looks simply astounding in it - sexy even. I should know because I borrowed it once and had comments that ranged from looking sickly to resembling a big banana.

Every woman has her sexy hue which she needs to discover. Once you get it, anything in that colour will simply fall into place. For me, blue and black seem to get the most attention from guys. Remember the test with my friends once? We all donned different coloured outfits and for me, the best comments came when I was in a black number.

Maybe its just me - I'm a witch after all! But seriously, I just feel more daring, bold and nasty when I am in black or blue.

I take my hat off to any woman who can pull it off in pink. I honestly abhor pink. Somehow I just don't feel sexy in that colour. I doubt if many women do? Even Molly Ringwald didn't look to hot in it, did she?

Every woman should be aware of her sexy hues. If by some reason you aren't, ask girlfriends or anyone you know who can provide an unbiased opinion. Never ask a man because he will say anything and everything nice! They don't care much about the colour of dress you wear because their favourite colour is simple - skin.

SO choose the right colour to bring out the best in you - one that helps you ooze confidence, independence, boldness and sensuality.

Missus Singapore out!

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Group Sex Parties May 24- May 30

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LOOK GOOD FOR BED

I'm not one to don make-up all day but even if I did, I would still doll myself up once in a while for a wild time in bed.

Granted it's not all the time that I do so, I find it helps when you make an effort to look good for your man. Call it my pre-mating ritual if you like.

By showing him how much you go out of your way to please him, you tend to get him to sit up. That has worked wonders for my significant other for the past 21 years and several of my friends who have taken my humble advice have also benefited from it.

We all want good sex and sometimes we need to work for it. After all we make the men do all sorts of things before they earn the opportunity to jump into bed with us(e.g. take out the garbage, take the dog out for a walk, pick up groceries from the store), so the least we can do is give them a visual feast occasionally.

It may only be one part of keeping the fires flaming in the relationship but when there is a surprising variety, it does retain their attention.

Interestingly, a survey I read in an Australian magazine found that for 77% of 268 couples, sex is significantly 'better, wilder and more fulfilling' when the woman dolls herself up with make up and lingerie.

So you see, even us women stand to gain from it. For a little dish and dab on the face, that is good returns, isn't it?

Missus Singapore out!

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THE PLAYGROUND (Garment District) - Review

I heard about this new party -- THE PLAYGROUND -- which is held in the Garment District. Never been, but a friend went this week, and sent in this review.

*

The Playground. I decided to check out The Playground based on the description that it was 'strictly for fit, athletic men.' A strict door policy - good. Too bad it was not enforced - at all. I was there from about 1 a.m. - 2 a.m. There were around 15 guys there. NONE of whom were fit or athletic. And many were definitely closer to the 45yo end of the spectrum. I actually felt out of place as the only young, fit, athletic guy there. Additionally, it was really dark - too dark. I was disappointed and overall did not enjoy the party. On the plus side, it is still a new party, the vibe was chill and guys were having fun. But beware of false advertising! This party is not 'strictly for fit, athletic men.'

***

If you're still interested, here the info...

THE PLAYGROUND (Garment District). Private M4M sex party, 11:30pm-4:30am, $20 donation. "Featuring 4 freak areas & heavy action!!" They claim it's for for "fit, athletic men, 18-45YO". Supplies, liquids & clothescheck provided. Send pics + stats to playgroundnyc@yahoo.com.

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PASSION IN EDEN

In the wondrous Garden of Eden, Adam had just met Eve and they got talking about sex. Eve was curious about what Adam did to have sex - after all, she was the first woman on earth.

So Adam took her by the hand and led her to a nearby tree and showed her a hole in the tree trunk, just about the right height for Adam to thrust his desires away.

Smiling, Eve said "Well now you don't have to have sex with the tree because I've got a hole too! So why don't you put it in me? Adam like?"

"Adam like, Adam like!" He replied.

She lay down on her back and opened her legs as wide as they would go.

Adam, excited by his impending moment of passion, took several steps back.

"Come on, big boy!" said Eve.

Adam ran towards Eve and kicked her between the legs as hard as he could!

"What was that for?" asked Eve.

"Oh, Adam must check for squirrels first."

Thanks for this Montray from India.

Missus Singapore out!

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HEADLINE NEWS!

ScienceDaily — Women around the world spend billions of dollars each year on exotic smelling perfumes and lotions in the hopes of attracting a mate. However, according to a new study in Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science, going "au natural" may be the best way to capture a potential mate's attention.

According to this study, carried out by Florida State University, male testosterone levels are influenced by odor signals emitted by females, particularly when they are ovulating (that is, when they are the most fertile).

Results revealed that men who smelled tee shirts of ovulating women subsequently had higher levels of testosterone than men who smelled tee shirts worn by non-ovulating women or men who smelled the control shirts. In addition, after smelling the shirts, the men rated the odors on pleasantness and rated the shirts worn by ovulating women as the most pleasant smelling.

As reported in ScienceDaily.com.

MS: Can you imagine if this is taken through a more robust study and proven to be true? There goes the perfume business! The study however, didn't indicate if any of the women had extreme BO.

Missus Singapore out!

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OUT WITH IT!

My dear MS readers, thanks for all your confessions. Here are two more interesting ones.

Confession 1:

"There is this sports personality on television who is quite popular. I recently read that she had been engaged to marry a foreign-born guy. When I saw his picture, I was shocked because I had only two nights before, had sex with him. Apparently, they were engaged sometime back so its obvious he has been unfaithful.

Besides myself, he also slept with another girl I know from the pub he frequents. The best part is he was quoted as saying how he never visits a pub without his 'other half'! My verdict? She can have him cos he is not worth much in bed!"

Amanda G, Singapore

Confession 2:

"For some reason, my girlfriend's mother can't stand me. She is really uptight anyway. One day, I ran by their house, promising to drop off some DVDs that I had borrowed from my girlfriend.

As I was about to place it on the side of the front door, movement through a glass panel in the door inside caught my attention. It was my girlfriend's mother giving head to another man - and it was not her husband. Seeing this as an opportunity, I gently knocked on the door to indicate that I had somethings to drop off.

I left immediately but making sure she saw me look at the unknown man. These days, I no longer have any problems with her. In fact, she has really been extremely nice to me. My girlfriend is pleased but is always wondering why?"

Walk-man Joe, Syracuse, US

Missus Singapore out!

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GRAPE SEX ANYONE?

I've always found that two glasses of wine are just about right for me to get into the right mood. Anything more and the horniness is gradually replaced by sleepiness. Of course I'm talking about a good quality wine not some cheap $7 bottle.

I had this discussion with three other friends and while they had different limits, they seemed to agree (all except one). Strangely enough, it took fewer glasses to get high for the ones who could hold their liquor.

Then last week, I stumbled upon this little snippet in Woman's Day, about a research project in Florence, Italy. It revealed that women who drink one to two glasses of wine a day, have a higher sexual desire, not to mention, they also enjoy better lubrication. This was in comparison to women who are less frequent drinkers.

Apparently, (and I'm not trying to insult anyone's intelligence), blood gets to the important lower regions (duh). It also said that a third glass of wine may make you dozy and dry!

So remember, ladies, holding your liquor has nothing to do with feeling frisky. You want to drink to get into the mood not get moody and dry.

Missus Singapore out!

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SEX POSITION FOR THE WEEK #13

MISSIONARY
Don't we all know this one. Or do we? As simple as it looks, I bet there are lots of women out there who have had their fair share of foul ups with guys who clearly don't get this position.

Let's look at the simple version, man on top with woman opening her legs - feet flat on the bed. I'm not talking about the 50 other variations - just simple missionary 101.

The biggest mistake? Banging pelvic bones. When you think about banging someone, visualisations of a guy furiously pounding his woman comes to mind. Non-stop slap, slap, slap - two bodies coming together when it really is only one hitting the other.

What I have realised is that many men just bang thinking it is part and parcel of the nasty. What they don't realise, and my girlfriends will attest to, is that the frontal tip of a woman's pelvic bone is prone to bruising. It's filled with lots of nerves so constant pounding can cause lots of discomfort after.

The proper way - well like all sex positions, takes skill. Anyone who says sex doesn't require skill is an idiot, because it does, even the most simple and fundamental moves.

You can pound a woman without hurting her. The way to do it is know how deep you go in and stop before bodies collide. Think strokes of pleasure. You can vary the rhythm, movement and speed but make sure, if you want to give her maximum pleasure, not to hit her body directly.

If you really like it fast and furious, that is not a problem. Enter at slightly a lower angle. Move your hips as if scooping up from below (I'm told it gives a great ab workout) or you can rest on your knees and penetrate such that your pelvic bones don't come together.

Now if you are thinking of passionate lovemaking, pelvic bone to pelvic bone is fine because the slow passionate strokes are unlikely to cause much discomfort.

Who says you don't need to think before you screw?

Missus Singapore out!

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Group Sex Parties May 17 - May 23

Sex Parties May 17 - May 23

PICK OF THE WEEK: TESTOSTERONE/ROME: CALIGULA'S ORGY (Friday)

*** Monday...
JACKS OF COLOR ( Chelsea ) at "Paddles" -- doors 7:00 to Midnight, goes 'til 2 am; A New York City Club For Men of Color "And Their Friends." Has HUGE parties 70-120 guys attend, all ages. http://www.jacksofcolor.com/

MUSCLE GROUP ( West Harlem/w140s) In small studio apartment. This small sex party really runs the gamut from incredibly hot guys to very average dudes. The host is a big guy, can be too much for some. Usually have 4-10 guys attend -- some 20- mostly 30- some 40 YOs. Have parties at random, but often Mondays. The best thing about this party is that it's one of the true orgies. Most parties are filled with guys having sex one-one-one or threesomes. At MUSCLE GROUP there is more often than not a pile of guys fucking and sucking off each other. FREE. *Send pics & Stats to: MUSCLFINALE@aol.com

HotParties 2006 (Times Square), 6 PM to 12AM. Held in a private 2-floor studio; Early Special : $15 from 6:00PM to 8:00PM; $22 from 8:00 PM to Midnight FOR INVITE: hotparties2006@verizon.net , hotparties4u2006@verizon.net ultrahotparties2006@verizon.net, or hotparties2006@msn.com

Tuesday...
THE PEAK PARTY (West Village). Held in a private apartment. 8pm-1am. SAFE SEX ONLY. Donation requested. Contact Scott at theclubhouseparties@gmail.com.

NEW YORK JACK (Times Square) Safe sex party for guys who like to JO. They are not selective about who gets in, so the guys run the gamut: all type of bodies, races, and ages. Sunday and Tuesday Parties at "Paddles"; 25 donation. http://www.nyjacks.com/

Wednesday...
THE OMEGA PARTY (Times Square). The host (who used to run the aplumuscle Party) claims that they get 70 to 120 guys per party (Sunday being the biggest night). The parties are laid back, mix crowd (not for "aplusmuscle guys", but for a more for general crowd). He says not too old, or too overweight. The age mix, he says ranges from 20 to 60YO, all races (60% white, 40% mixed), muscle, thin, cute , bear etc. They host 2 to 3 parties per week. Refreshments , snacks, condoms and lube provided. "You may keep your underwear and T-shirt on if you like" but no heavy clothing inside. The place is nice. Its a small residential building ,on a commercial block close to a hotel and theirs no other neighbors in the building. The party is on the second and 3rd floor: 3 bathrooms , lounges , different theme rooms , couches, refreshments, porn area , music, nice lighting etc. Time: 6PM TO 2 AM, DOORS 6PM TO 12 am; Donation: $25; early bird special $20(6pm to 8 pm). coat check $1. My friend went last Sunday, and was disappointed (see review below under A-PLUS MUSCLE), but they are just starting and hopely will build a good list. To me, it seems like another open-door policy party, which means a lot of older, out-of-shape dudes, but give it shot and let me know.
Anybody wanting to go to our party should email westvillageclub@aol.com

REAL MEN ONLY (RMO) PARTY (Fresh Meadows) Slurpee Coach has the parties weekly on Wed eve 7-11pm. For older/average guys. To get in, email pics/stats here: slurpeecoach@hotmail.com.

CUMMONKEY/GRAB ASS PARTY (Chelsea) Held at Paddles, a dungeon-like party space. Usually 30-50 guys attend, 25 to 55 height/weight proportionate. "All body types, extremely friendly group with a bit of something for everyone." Every Wednesday, 8pm-3am. If you arrive from 8pm to 9pm, admission is $20.00 plus $2.00 clothing check. If you arrive after 9pm to 1am, admission is 25.00 plus 2.00 clothing check. (I haven't been in a while: but I hear attendance is down, and so is the quality of guys). For more information, check out: http://cummonkey.com/. For invitation: send a pic and stats to hunteur@verizon.net.

HUMP WEDNESDAY PARTY (Gramercy). SOS-only runned party, which means it probably sucks like the SOS party, but if you're old, fat and deperate, give it a shot. Only a $10.00 Donation; 6pm till Midnight. E-Mail nybutt@yahoo.com or http://www.gaysexpartiesnyc.com/.

Thursday...
THE ERUPTION PARTY (West Willage). An open door policy party from the guy who brings you THE XTUBE PARTY. Does not insist on safe sex - lots to bb. Held in a private apartment. 8pm-1am. Donation requested. Send pics and stats to Scott at theclubhouseparties@gmail.com.

DARRELL’S DUNGEON (Chelsea). Leather, Military or Less. All Male, All Colors, Anything Goes…Thursdays (9PM-3AM). Held at PADDLES (w26). For more information, check out: http://www.darrellsdungeon.mobi/. For invitation, send stats and pics to darrell@darrellsdungeon.com

BRUTHAS AND FRIENDS PARTY (Corona) This party is held in a private apartment; Thursday, 6PM-MIDNIGHT, or Fridays, 8PM to 3AM; $15 donation. Refreshments and snacks provided For Invite: Men4MenPlay@yahoo.com

Friday...
THE PLAYGROUND (Garment District). Private M4M sex party, 11:30pm-4:30am, $10 donation. "Featuring 4 freak areas & heavy action!!" Strictly for fit, athletic men, 18-45YO. Supplies, liquids & clothescheck provided. Never been to this one.Send pics + stats to playgroundnyc@yahoo.com.

TESTOSTERONE (Gramercy) -- Formerly THE OLYMPUS PARTY. Tonight's theme is "ROME: CALIGULA'S ORGY." If you like HUGE PARTIES – This is it. Penthouse duplex complete with themed rooms, and a "Sky Box" viewing gallery overlooking all the action below, everyone is naked (no underwear allowed). This is a HUGE, HUGE party--100-150 guys (can hold 200). Every Friday: 9pm-3am. $20 donation to get in. The guy who runs this also runs Raw Pork, and Metropolis. In my experience, it's a very mixed crowd--too many out-of-shape/older guys for my taste with only a few hot guys there), There is no attitude, but way too much BB (unfortunately safe sex is not required), and the place is TOO DARK (put some lights on). *For Invite: MUST Send pic (shirtless from the waist up is fine) & Stats to: apollothegreek@earthlink.net (http://www.gaysexpartiesnyc.com/).

HOT BROOKLYN PARTY (Brooklyn) 18-35yo ONLY. Usually more than 60 cute boys; *All lean in shape guys: No fats, chubs, dads, or bears. ($20 Donation for New Members; $15 Donation for Members; College Boy Twinks 18-23yo Free 10pm-12am /$10 Donation after 12am). Unlimited Cosmos and Beer 11PM-3AM. Party runs 10PM- 4 AM.*Send pics & Stats to: hotbrooklynparty@nyc.rr.com

THUGS 4 THUGS SEX PARTY ( Brooklyn ) Hot party for Black and Latino guys, and guys who love big black cocks. Safe sex only for in shape guys—huge space (2 huge floors), fresh towels and condoms/lube provided, held every Friday (12midnight. its a safe and clean place. lots of space. a bit dark but eyes get used to it. $15 http://thugs4thugsex.com or email bkthugparty@earthlink.net

Saturday...

THE NYJOCK PARTY--NYJP (Park Slope) 10pm-5am. The host is very discriminating -- and because of it the party now has the hottest guys with the most attitudes (the problem: not great sex; many guys just standing around looking at each other). If you don't have a killer body and face, you'll probably just be ignored. That said the guys are amazing: mostly 20s-early 30s. Usually have 50-70 guys attend. Usually once or 2X a month. $20 (10pm-11pm) $25 donation after 11pm. Party was better when it was in Manhattan, the Brooklyn party is much smaller.
email stats + pics to: nyjockparty@yahoo.com

JACKS OF COLOR ( Chelsea ) "SATURDAY AFTERNOON PARTY" at "Paddles" -- doors 1:00 to 6:00, goes 'til 8 pm; A New York City Club For Men of Color "And Their Friends." Has HUGE parties 70-120 guys attend, all ages. [ This is the first AFTERNOON party -- which will take place Every 4th Saturday Thereafter ]
http://www.jacksofcolor.com/

SOS: SEX ON SATURDAYS (Grammercy) --- Was "Sex on Sundays" and formerly "Buttlickers" Now held in the E20s -- in HUGE beautiful duplex apt. Orgy every Saturday, . Unfortunately --the have an open door policy and let in ANYBODY -- so the place is FILLED with overweight and really old flabby guys. Possible the most disgusting party I've ever attended. If you are desperate for sex with anyone (or get off with gross old guys -- GO; if you have ANY self esteem, and have ever been to the gym (ever) then SKIP THIS ONE. I often get off on sex with old dudes, but these are NOT hot. Charge is $20 for in and out access 2pm (saturday afternoon) till 2am. Email for invite: nybutt@yahoo.com or check out: www.GaySexPartiesNYC.com.

THE MEN’S PARTY (West Harlem) In big apartment in Harlem . 9pm-2am. The party is a mix from a few hot young guys to some fat old guys. The party is not strict about safe sex and lots of bb. Has sling. The host is nice, but I personally never like the vibe — too sleazy for me (which is v. sleazy). Usually has about 20-40 guys attending from 30-40 YOs . NOT a safe sex party. Have parties at least once a week. $25. Email here: TheMensParty@yahoo.com or check out http://www.themensparty.com/

SEX PARTY QUEENS (Ozone Park). Held in a private apartment, Donation $24 person/$40 Couple, 9pm-am (doors close at 10:30pm).Email pics + stats to: SexPartyQueens@gmail.com.

THUGS 4 THUGS SEX PARTY ( Brooklyn ) Hot party for Black and Latino guys, and guys who love big black cocks. Safe sex only for in shape guys—huge space (2 huge floors), fresh towels and condoms/lube provided, held every Sat (12midnight-7am). its a safe and clean place. lots of space. a bit dark but eyes get used to it. $15 http://thugs4thugsex.com or email bkthugparty@earthlink.net

GALLERY OF MEN (Times Square) every two weeks, 20s - 40s mostly holdovers from GCN/Studio days. Lots of BB, smoking area within the facility. Filled with 99% old, out-of-shape, gross guys. $20 admission first hour, $25 after that. 9PM-3AM. Email for invite: thegallerynyc@yahoo.com

Sunday…
THE OMEGA PARTY (Times Square). The host (who used to run the aplumuscle Party) claims that they get 70 to 120 guys per party (Sunday being the biggest night). The parties are laid back, mix crowd (not for "aplusmuscle guys", but for a more for general crowd). He says not too old, or too overweight. The age mix, he says ranges from 20 to 60YO, all races (60% white, 40% mixed), muscle, thin, cute , bear etc. They host 2 to 3 parties per week. Refreshments , snacks, condoms and lube provided. "You may keep your underwear and T-shirt on if you like" but no heavy clothing inside. The place is nice. Its a small residential building ,on a commercial block close to a hotel and theirs no other neighbors in the building. The party is on the second and 3rd floor: 3 bathrooms , lounges , different theme rooms , couches, refreshments, porn area , music, nice lighting etc. Time: 6PM TO 2 AM, DOORS 6PM TO 12 am; Donation: $25; early bird special $20(6pm to 8 pm). coat check $1. My friend went last Sunday, and was disappointed (see review below under A-PLUS MUSCLE), but they are just starting and hopely will build a good list. To me, it seems like another open-door policy party, which means a lot of older, out-of-shape dudes, but give it shot and let me know.
Anybody wanting to go to our party should email westvillageclub@aol.com

THUGS 4 THUGS SEX PARTY ( Brooklyn ) Hot party for Black and Latino guys, and guys who love big black cocks. Safe sex only for in shape guys—huge space (2 huge floors), fresh towels and condoms/lube provided, held every Sunday (9pm-3am). its a safe and clean place. lots of space: two floor. a bit dark but eyes get used to it. $15 http://thugs4thugsex.com or email bkthugparty@earthlink.net

THE ERUPTION PARTY (West Willage). An open door policy party from the guy who brings you THE XTUBE PARTY (no XTUBE party this week). Does not insist on safe sex - lots to bb. Held in a private apartment. 8pm-1am. Donation requested. Send pics and stats to Scott at theclubhouseparties@gmail.com.

ED AND STEVE GROUP (Upper Manhattan-Washington Heights area) Interracial gay group that meet 5pm-12am. Generally for older guys. Email: EdAndSteve@verizon.net; or check out http://groups.yahoo.com/group/EdAndSteve

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SEX ACCORDING TO THE EXPERTS

I was reading who whole stack of research on sexology (by clinical sexologists) passed on to me by a friend and was left feeling really stupid for them. By and large, they are making announcements that the man-on-the-street would probably already know. Nothing new really.

One of them claims to have found out that a woman touches you the way she wants to be touched. Duh?

Now if a woman begins to gently run her fingers over your body does she really expect you to start slapping her butt or pulling her hair to position her mouth where you want to? Come on. I mean there probably is some guy out there like that but most of them know better?

I agree that a woman tends to set the tone for sex - either she wants it rough and wild or soft and passionate. If ever in doubt, start out slow and you can take it from there to see how robust she wants it.

But then again, if she is already sinking her fingernails into your back whilst rubbing up against you in the lift to your apartment, you can pretty much figure out that she expects a sweaty encounter el pronto.

Looking for her signs to know you are heading in the right direction for her to orgasm? Yeah, I agree that helps but they talk about looking at the colour of her clitoris and labia. The problem with these PhDs is that they obviously don't realise that its not exactly well illuminated down south.

Besides, another study I read found that 76% of people are most comfortable having sex in the dark! These guys are too technical.

Another says that her pupils will dilate. Are you kidding me? In the throngs of ecstasy, I've never heard of a woman opening her eyes for you to look at them. And if its all dark - it's not exactly easy to see them unless you stick your face up close to do so.

It's more accurate to observe her breathing, toe-curling, hand grabbing, moistness and contractions (you can feel it by placing your hand over her abdominal area). And you won't need any light to figure this.

So if you really want to know more about pleasing a woman, it is always going to be easier to do it hands-on. Learn as you play, as I always say. Anyway, sex is a natural part of us and sooner or later, there is a high probability that we will unleash what we all have imbedded in us - our sexual instinct.

Even Homer has been known to be an animal in bed, if Marge is to be believed.

Missus Singapore out!

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SEXPLOITATION IN THE OFFICE

Here are a few cartoons sent in by Nicole from S.Africa. It probably sums up what women have to do to rise up the career ladder and once there, how useful they are to the corporate setup. We are vital to get things running smoothly.

Securing employment.

Working their butts off.

Multitasking.

So you see guys, you better appreciate what we have to do to get where we are and the pivotal role we all play to ensure that the corporation stays afloat.

Missus Singapore out!

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DESSERT OR DICK?

I was attending a press event the other day and was pleased to be attended to by a very handsome and strappy young man. Apparently he was the PR person - males are not commonly found in the job here - who was in charge of the woman's beauty product.

I found him most pleasant but then was a little uncomfortable when his conversation swing from the products spotlighted to how sexy and hot I looked! Don't get me wrong, I will lap up any kind of compliment from men but there was always a proper forum and place for that. Anywhere else and I'd probably have his dick in my hand before you can say George Washington but this was different.

So I decided to ignore his come-ons but my 'high levels of professionalism' soon fell on its face when I was faced with another challenge. It fell like a brick. I gave in. It was the dessert spread!

It was the most amazing spread I had ever seen - I mean ever. Chocolate desserts Charlie could only dream of and a variety of sweet pastries you only see in a pastry shoppe.

Suddenly Marcus, the PR guy, was farthest from my mind - but so too was the reason why I was there. Needless to say I had to call him later to find out what I should have otherwise absorbed from the event.

I'm not sure why but women are suckers for dessert. Dick or dessert - that's a hard one to decide for me. Indulgence in desserts is a sin bigger than casual sex but it doesn't look like its gonna change anytime soon. Perhaps another reason why many women tend to swoon when meeting up with a pastry chef or any type of chef for that matter.

So if you want a job that really draws the women to you like flies to icing - the job to shoot for is a sweet and pastry chef. The perfect thing for women like me - we no longer have to decide between desserts and dick any more because we will get both!

Missus Singapore out!

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CORK TALES

This one was sent in by Diane from Switzerland. Thanks so much Diane and for the photos of you and your extremely large garden. Over here, gardens that size are called parks!

Here goes.

Jim was in the locker room last week and saw something really strange. There was this guy walking around with a cork in his ass. Now, usually Jim is the sort to keep things to himself but this time around, he just couldn't let this go.

So, he walked over and asked the man, "Excuse me that cork in your ass looks really uncomfortable, I was wondering why it's there."

Jim wasn't sure what his reaction would be but the man was surprisingly very nice and understanding.

He replied, "While I was on vacation last week I found a bottle on the beach ... I picked it up and after rubbing the sand off of it a genie came out and said I'm really tired I'll grant you only one wish.... I was really surprised and said NO SHIT!"

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