BUTT STUCK

It's hailed as a life-saver in engineering. Mechanics swear by it. At home it's great for keeping door hinges squeak-free. You might even have used it to dislodge a tight ring from your finger. Ahh, the benefits and joys of lubricants.

As as this cartoon demonstrates, it may also make a big difference when you want to inject a little butt action into your mundane bedroom antics.

I read about this couple who had to call the doctor in for that very problem. The man was on Viagra and it just couldn't come out. I'm just confused as to how that was possible. But apparently, a bit of Vaseline and some gentle rocking did the trick!

Moral of the story - Take lessons from porn at your own peril! What you don't see (i.e. women lubricating themselves) doesn't mean that they don't grease themselves up really good off camera.

Missus Singapore out!

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EVEN PERFECT BODIES NEED HELP

My girlfriend Linda is a fitness instructor and has a body that is hard all over as it is toned. I've often commented how her body seems chiseled to perfection. But of course if you work out all day, I'm sure it will come to everyone.

But seriously she has a body to die for. The best part is that she is in her early 40s and can put many young women in their 20s to shame. Unfortunately for you guys out there, she is gay.

I suppose more accurately, she is a bisexual. The reason is because she was heterosexual when she was younger (I know since she was often my partner in crime for painting the town read - oh how I miss those wild 80s).

She has had more than a few boyfriends since and in fact for one of them, wedding bells were starting to sound until by mutual consent, they broke it off.

By her own admission, she says that she could be considered a lazy lover, which I found totally surprising. A body like that and you'll think she will be doing sexual gymnastics 24/7. She told me that she really sucked in bed. Well don't we all suck in bed. But seriously, she claims to be a little frigid when it comes to men. With women, she says she has no problem.

When we met during Christmas last year, she asked if I could show her how to please a man! Moi? She was then getting a little bored with relationships with women and wanted to revisit with her heterosexuality. And here I was hoping I could run my fingers over her hard body! LOL!

Well I agreed to do what I could but gave her no promises. She called yesterday to remind me of our arrangement and said she had a male subject in mind. I'm still figuring out how to go about it. Should I have a ruler in hand? Should I be present while they do it? Or should I just sit them down and explain to them the wonders of sexual pleasure. Hey, after all I'm still a student of the sexual arts.

Doing it is one thing but physically teaching someone else is not exactly bread and butter, even for a bitch like me! It's become so instinctive for me - you know, like making patterns with your fingers using a rubber-band. You can show it but when it is on someone else's hands, it gets tricky.

But nonetheless, for the sake of good sex, Missus Singapore will step forward and face up to the challenge. Who knows I may just have a potential business idea in the burner.

This is again another lesson in reality for me because nothing is as it appears. I suddenly don't feel so bad that my body ain't as hard and toned as I always wanted it to be.

Missus Singapore out!

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SEX POSITION FOR THE WEEK #11

MAN-ON-TOP (REAR)
Without creativity, sex can get boring after a while. What spices things up is the ability to modify regular positions and surprise each other. You can never tell if a new position can suddenly rock your world.

Take this man-on-top (rear) position for instance. I'm not referring to the doggy position by the way. Again, like all pictures in a sex book, it always looks easy. Indeed it is easy to get into position but that is where the easy part ends. The right kind of movement is imperative.

From my experience, it is the older more experienced guy who tends to know what to do in this position. Most would start thrusting the moment they are in. But an experienced guy would use his tool to play with a woman's walls, inner and outer.

Once again, the side to side is great but for me, the up and down is highly arousing. Using his head to brush against the inner grooves of the vagina is titillating as it is exciting for the woman - with breaks in the rhythm in the form of deep slow thrusts. Simply delightful.

For added penetration, try placing a hard pillow under her tummy. With a slightly elevated entry, it can do wonders for some women. Vary to find the sweet spot for her.

Missus Singapore out!

Photo courtesy of Sex-techniques-and-positions.

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A BOUQUET OF DICKS

Thanks so much for all your emails and well wishes! I've been overwhelmed and deeply touched.

When you start a blog, you always set off doing it for what you believe in (most of the time at least). Then, the novelty and enthusiasm withers a little. It doesn't help that problems with blogger put me off for almost nine months!

However, after sometime, you really start to wonder if anyone really reads it. I certainly did.

Over the years, I've come to realise and appreciate that there is actually a group out there who visit MS on a regular basis - seeing from the emails, jokes, photos and confessions that I've received. In fact, on closer observation, it was heartening to find out that some have followed MS from Day 1.

Fred from California is one of them. It was he who sent in this lovely bouquet to wish me the best. Fred, thanks so much and you really know the type of bouquet that I love.

I'm sure for many women, this is the kind of bouquet they would certainly accept with open legs, I meant mouths. Sorry - hands. Okay, okay...arms!

Missus Singapore out!

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Group Sex Parties May 3 - May 9

Sex Parties May 3 - May 9

PICK OF THE WEEK: ***JACKS OF COLOR(Monday)***

Monday...
JACKS OF COLOR ( Chelsea ) "SPRING MAY MASSAGE MONDAY PARTY #1"at "Paddles" -- doors 7:00 to Midnight, goes 'til 2 am; A New York City Club For Men of Color "And Their Friends." Has HUGE parties 70-120 guys attend, all ages.
http://www.jacksofcolor.com/

MUSCLE GROUP ( West Harlem/w140s) In small studio apartment. This small sex party really runs the gamut from incredibly hot guys to very average dudes. The host is a big guy, can be too much for some. Usually have 4-10 guys attend -- some 20- mostly 30- some 40 YOs. Have parties at random, but often Mondays. The best thing about this party is that it's one of the true orgies. Most parties are filled with guys having sex one-one-one or threesomes. At MUSCLE GROUP there is more often than not a pile of guys fucking and sucking off each other. FREE. *Send pics & Stats to: MUSCLFINALE@aol.com

HotParties 2006 (Times Square), 6 PM to 12AM. Held in a private 2-floor studio; Early Special : $15 from 6:00PM to 8:00PM; $22 from 8:00 PM to Midnight FOR INVITE: hotparties2006@verizon.net , hotparties4u2006@verizon.net ultrahotparties2006@verizon.net, or hotparties2006@msn.com

Tuesday...
THE PEAK PARTY (West Village). Held in a private apartment. 8pm-1am. SAFE SEX ONLY. Donation requested. Contact Scott at theclubhouseparties@gmail.com.

NEW YORK JACK (Times Square) Safe sex party for guys who like to JO. They are not selective about who gets in, so the guys run the gamut: all type of bodies, races, and ages. Sunday and Tuesday Parties at "Paddles"; 25 donation. http://www.nyjacks.com/

Wednesday...
REAL MEN ONLY (RMO) PARTY (Fresh Meadows) Slurpee Coach has the parties weekly on Wed eve 7-11pm. For older/average guys. To get in, email pics/stats here: slurpeecoach@hotmail.com.

CUMMONKEY/GRAB ASS PARTY (Chelsea) Held at Paddles, a dungeon-like party space. Usually 30-50 guys attend, 25 to 55 height/weight proportionate. "All body types, extremely friendly group with a bit of something for everyone." Every Wednesday, 8pm-3am. If you arrive from 8pm to 9pm, admission is $20.00 plus $2.00 clothing check. If you arrive after 9pm to 1am, admission is 25.00 plus 2.00 clothing check. (I haven't been in a while: but I hear attendance is down, and so is the quality of guys). For more information, check out: http://cummonkey.com/. For invitation: send a pic and stats to hunteur@verizon.net.

HUMP WEDNESDAY PARTY (Gramercy). SOS-only party, which means it probably sucks. Only a $10.00 Donation; 6pm till Midnight; The First Party Date Is Wednesday May 5th and will be held every Wednesday. Their other party sucks royaly, so I don't have much hope for this one (check out SOS review on Saturday). E-Mail nybutt@yahoo.com or http://www.gaysexpartiesnyc.com/.

Thursday...
THE ERUPTION PARTY (West Willage). An open door policy party from the guy who brings you THE XTUBE PARTY. Does not insist on safe sex - lots to bb. Held in a private apartment. 8pm-1am. Donation requested. Send pics and stats to Scott at theclubhouseparties@gmail.com.

DARRELL’S DUNGEON (Chelsea). Leather, Military or Less. All Male, All Colors, Anything Goes…Thursdays (9PM-3AM). Held at PADDLES (w26). For more information, check out: http://www.darrellsdungeon.mobi/. For invitation, send stats and pics to darrell@darrellsdungeon.com

BRUTHAS AND FRIENDS PARTY (Corona) This party is held in a private apartment; Thursday, 6PM-MIDNIGHT, or Fridays, 8PM to 3AM; $15 donation. Refreshments and snacks provided For Invite: Men4MenPlay@yahoo.com

Friday...
TESTOSTERONE (Gramercy) -- Formerly THE OLYMPUS PARTY. If you like HUGE PARTIES – This is it. Penthouse duplex complete with themed rooms, and a "Sky Box" viewing gallery overlooking all the action below, everyone is naked (no underwear allowed). This is a HUGE, HUGE party--100-150 guys (can hold 200). Every Friday: 9pm-3am. $20 donation to get in. The guy who runs this also runs Raw Pork, and Metropolis. In my experience, it's a very mixed crowd--too many out-of-shape/older guys for my taste with only a few hot guys there), There is no attitude, but way too much BB (unfortunately safe sex is not required), and the place is TOO DARK (put some lights on). *For Invite: MUST Send pic (shirtless from the waist up is fine) & Stats to: apollothegreek@earthlink.net (http://www.gaysexpartiesnyc.com/).

GALLERY OF MEN (Times Square) every two weeks, 20s - 40s mostly holdovers from GCN/Studio days. Lots of BB, smoking area within the facility. Filled with 99% old, out-of-shape, gross guys. $20 admission first hour, $25 after that. 9PM-3AM. Email for invite: thegallerynyc@yahoo.com

THUGS 4 THUGS SEX PARTY ( Brooklyn ) Hot party for Black and Latino guys, and guys who love big black cocks. Safe sex only for in shape guys—huge space (2 huge floors), fresh towels and condoms/lube provided, held every Friday (12midnight. its a safe and clean place. lots of space. a bit dark but eyes get used to it. $15 http://thugs4thugsex.com or email bkthugparty@earthlink.net

Saturday...
COLLEGE WATER SPORTS KEGGER PARTY and GOLDEN BOYS USA (Park Slope/Brooklyn) Held in the basement space in a brownstone. Only accept guys who are in-shape, 18-30 years old, and get into (or tolerant of) guys pissing on other guys -- they NOW also have NON-WATER SPORT parties. Have regular rooms and wet rooms (even though there is a water sports theme, you don't have to be into W/S to have fun at this party). (I've never been to this one. This was reported to me by the promoter. Email me for their website.) Average 75-120 guys attend, all 20 YOs, $25. Second Saturday of every other month. ALSO have general UNDERWEAR parties every so often. http://www.goldenboysusa.com/

PAPI BROTHAS HOTEL SUITE PARTY (Midtown) A party for 20-40YO Black, Latin and Mixed guys ONLY held a hot hotel suite with open Bar, exotic dancers, sodas, wine, bottled water. Email pics/stats to Latinman4sexymen@aol.com or
check out http://papibrothasnyc.blogspot.com/?zx=46415ca9e7e3bd93.

SOS: SEX ON SATURDAYS (Grammercy) --- Was "Sex on Sundays" and formerly "Buttlickers" Now held in the E20s -- in HUGE beautiful duplex apt. Orgy every Saturday, . Unfortunately --the have an open door policy and let in ANYBODY -- so the place is FILLED with overweight and really old flabby guys. Possible the most disgusting party I've ever attended. If you are desperate for sex with anyone (or get off with gross old guys -- GO; if you have ANY self esteem, and have ever been to the gym (ever) then SKIP THIS ONE. I often get off on sex with old dudes, but these are NOT hot. Also, they will host the occasional Saturday night party. Charge is $20 for in and out access 9pm till 3AM. Email for invite: nybutt@yahoo.com or check out: www.GaySexPartiesNYC.com.

THUGS 4 THUGS SEX PARTY ( Brooklyn ) Hot party for Black and Latino guys, and guys who love big black cocks. Safe sex only for in shape guys—huge space (2 huge floors), fresh towels and condoms/lube provided, held every Sat (12midnight-7am). its a safe and clean place. lots of space. a bit dark but eyes get used to it. $15 http://thugs4thugsex.com or email bkthugparty@earthlink.net

Sunday…
A-PLUS MUSCLE PARTY (Times Square). This is a safer sex private party for attractive guys of all racesRefreshments , snacks, condoms and lube provided. "You may keep your underwear and T-shirt on if you like" but no heavy clothing inside. The place is nice. Its a small residential building ,on a commercial block close to a hotel and theirs no other neighbors in the building. The party is on the second and 3rd floor: 3 bathrooms , lounges , different theme rooms , couches, refreshments, porn area , music, nice lighting etc. Time: 6PM TO 2 AM, DOORS 6PM TO 12 am; Donation: $25; early bird special $20(6pm to 8 pm). coat check $1.
*EMAIL PICS AND STATS TO: aplusmuscle@aol.com

ED AND STEVE GROUP (Upper Manhattan-Washington Heights area) Interracial gay group that meet twice a month. 5pm-12pm. Email: EdAndSteve@verizon.net; http://groups.yahoo.com/group/EdAndSteve

THUGS 4 THUGS SEX PARTY ( Brooklyn ) Hot party for Black and Latino guys, and guys who love big black cocks. Safe sex only for in shape guys—huge space (2 huge floors), fresh towels and condoms/lube provided, held every Sunday (9pm-3am). its a safe and clean place. lots of space: two floor. a bit dark but eyes get used to it. $15 http://thugs4thugsex.com or email bkthugparty@earthlink.net

THE XTUBE PARTY (West Village). Perfect for exhibitionists and voyeurs...At The Xtube Party the fucking is actually filmned for Xxtube.com. The host provides masks to hide your identity (you can also wear sunglasses and a hat if you want). On Xtube the videos are listed under "The Clubhouse". Does not insist on safe sex - lots to bb. Held in a private apartment. 8pm-1am. Donation requested. Contact Scott at theclubhouseparties@gmail.com.

THE MEN’S PARTY (West Harlem)
In big apartment in Harlem . The party is a mix from a few hot young guys to some fat old guys (they also run BEAR HUNT--see below). The party is not strict about safe sex and lots of bb. Has sling. The host is nice, but I personally never like the vibe — too sleazy for me (which is v. sleazy). Usually has about 20-40 guys attending (although last time I went a few weeks ago there were only 6 guys there)from 30-40 YOs . NOT a safe sex party. Have
parties at least once a week. $25. Email here: TheMensParty@yahoo.com or check out www.themensparty.com

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ASK THE BOLDER WOMAN

Q: Do women really like a body massage or is it just an excuse to not have sex?

MS: Honestly, it could be an excuse to HAVE sex. You need to understand what touch does to a woman and how her body reacts to it. Massage involves a sensual touch which is most relaxing when you do get the areas and pressure right.

By releasing the blocked energy flow in her body, you will also help stir up her sexual energy. Any woman who says she doesn’t feel some measure of arousal during a massage is lying. So brush up on your massage skills if you want to stand a better chance of loosening and priming her up for the act.

Missus Singapore out!

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MISSUS SINGAPORE TURNS 4!

I just wanted to take some time off to announce that as of 1 May 2010, Missus Singapore is four years old! Four years of blogging, 500 posts and numerous friends made. That can't be all bad can it?

As a tribute, I've decided to put up a rare one-off photo of myself. Hopefully it will help put a face to Missus Singapore.

Please feel free to send in your best wishes, emails, jokes, stories, photos and monetary contributions if you like (LOL)!

Here's hoping I'll still have the stamina for another four years of blogging. If you have any suggestions on how I can further improve Missus Singapore, please send them in. Love ya all.

High-five me!

Missus Singapore out!

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