Tampilkan postingan dengan label ANIMALS. Tampilkan semua postingan
Tampilkan postingan dengan label ANIMALS. Tampilkan semua postingan

Selasa, 07 September 2010

THREE WISHES

One day in a great forest, a magical frog was hopping down to a water hole. This forest was so big that the frog had never seen another animal in all his life. But by chance that day, he witnessed a bear chasing after a rabbit. The frog called for the two to stop.

The frog said, "Because you are the only two animals I have ever seen, I will grant you both three wishes. Bear, you go first." The bear thought for a minute, and being the male he was, he said, "I wish for all the bears in this forest, besides me, to be female."

For his first wish, the rabbit asked for a crash helmet and immediately put it on. The bear was amazed at the stupidity of the rabbit, wasting his wish like that.

It was the bear's second turn for a wish. "Well, I wish that all the bears in the next forest were female as well." Rabbit then asked for a motorcycle and immediately hopped on it and gunned the engine. The bear was shocked that the rabbit was asking for these stupid things; after all, he could have asked for money and bought the motorcycle.

For his last wish, the bear thought for a moment and then said, "I wish that all the bears in the world, besides me, were female." The rabbit grinned, gunned the engine, and said as he sped away, "I wish that the bear was gay..."

MS: MS Dairy, thanks for all the animal-centric jokes. I found this one especially amusing!

Missus Singapore out!

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Senin, 26 Juli 2010

SEX BITS - THE ANIMAL CONNECTION

Here are some interesting sex bits sent in by Carlo from Veracruz in Mexico. I won't even begin to question any of them but it makes for an interesting real.

FACT 1: Male and female rats may have sex twenty times a day.

MS: I used to be like that 20 years ago. Now its only half that number!

FACT 2: Turkeys can reproduce without having sex. It’s called parthenogenesis.

MS: If only humans can do it, we would have a valid excuse when we have to explain the belly hump to our parents.

FACT 3: Male bats have the highest rate of homosexuality of any mammal.

MS: That explains why they always seem to attack voluptuous women wearing wet see-through Ts in the movies.

FACT 4: Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

MS: It never mentioned if they were dreaming about it whilst laying under a big shady tree for 18 hours a day while the female is out hunting.

FACT 5: Snakes have two sex organs.

MS: It does make a menage a trois so much easier to organise, doesn't it.

FACT 6: A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

MS: No wonder Porky always stammers and looks stoned.

Missus Singapore out!

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